First Day of My Last Year Of Grad School

Unless I decide to get my PhD in like twenty years, haha, this will be my last first day of school. I can't say I will miss the first day feeling. I am very nervous, even though the last time I was in a classroom was a month and a half ago since I took two summer classes throughout May, June, and July. I hate the whole introduction thing that most professors do...I know it's to break the ice but most of the time I really have to think to say something about myself. I know I still really need to work on participation in classes-I should not get all worked up about it but it still happens. I have always been shy but as I got older, I realized it formed more into anxiety---making me feel sick to my stomach at times. So I am fighting to get over this once and for all. I want to be the best social worker I can and social workers are supposed to be people persons anyways so I better get there :). I think this year is going to stretch me a lot further than last year but in the end I know it will teach me even more to take charge of things in my professional life to gain the tools I need for my future.

Today I start classes. I still need to figure out a few things before I can start my internship which is bugging me but it will be straightened out soon. My classes go as follows: Group Work on Mondays starting at three and then Applied Research six-thirty to eight or Field Instruction every other Monday. Wednesday I have Mental Health Multidimentional Assessment and Mental Health Theory from three to nine. Saturdays for the next five weeks I will be taking Death and Bereavement which I am both interested in and apprehensive about since I have had so much traumatic life experiences throughout my childhood and adolescence. I will be writing in depth about those experiences which will be both easy because I have so much first-hand experience and hard because I will have to relive some of the memories as I process everything. But I know that this self-awareness will just provide further healing and growth in end so I will get through it okay. I also will have to facilitate some sort of group through my internship so that will be another area which will stretch me this fall.

All this is not in vain though, I am following my dreams to help others and make a difference in life. I am ready as I can be for what is to come.

Stolen Quote of the Day

Therapy is heart surgery without anesthesia - Dr. Jill Corrigan

some thoughts

Sometimes I wish...
I had a million bucks.

Sometimes I miss...
the dish network i had in my first apt.


I never miss...
living in a dorm by myself.

I never wish...
evil upon anyone.

I don't understand...
how people can be so selfish & hateful.

I'd like to understand...
my "family" better.

I will never understand...
why some people walk away from friendships so easily.

I have always understood...
that life is short.

My best feature is...
physically, I'd say my hair. Personality-wise, I'd say my ability to listen and be supportive.

My worst feature is...
physically, I choose not to go there because it's not worth getting fixated on the outside these days. Personality-wise, my reluctance in opening up to others (especially when in groups).

When I look at myself, I think...
about the fact that I have went a lot farther in life than I ever could've realized 10 years ago.

Other people see me as...
it depends on the person, but I hope it's a positive response.

If I could look like someone else, I would look like...
no one. I am content with who God made me.

My personality, in three words, is...
a hidden extrovert.

If I were a color, I'd be...
bright colors-pink, turquoise, lime green, yellow, orange. I like to have fun and these colors reflect that I believe.

If I were a character in a book, I'd be...
Ariel from The Little Mermaid.

If I were a character in a film, I'd be...
Peyton from One Tree Hill.

I can relate to...
other Christians who've been through storms and made it out stronger and closer to God.

My friends are...
few but valuable to me.

My family is... 
to me my grandparents, aunt and uncle...the other part is something I have yet to figure out :/.

I smile when...
I am with those I love.

I cry when...
I'm frustrated.

I laugh when...
something gives me reason to find joy and humor and I am happy.

I get angry when...
things build up and I am stressed.

My biggest pet peeve is...
selfishness.

The best emotional feeling in the world is...
knowing that you are loved unconditionally.

The best physical feeling in the world is...
falling asleep next to the one you love.

Happiness comes in the form of...
1st) Jesus 2)being with those you love and who love you back

Solace comes in the form of...
Jesus, music, worship, prayer, writing, being outside.

My priorities in life are...
Jesus, family, grad school, friends, mis. responsibilities.

When I'm older, I would like...
to own a house, write a book, and travel for missions.

Before I die, I would like...
to help many live better lives & know Jesus more.

I'm afraid of...
not being able to pursue my passions & losing touch with those I love.

I try hard to...
love like Jesus did.

I can't ever seem to...
stop worrying about the little things these days.

I have a talent for...
scrapbooking.

My dream is to...
be in full-time missions work as an international social worker.

My childhood was...
too-little, too-fast. You grow up fast & not always best without a mother.

My future looks...
bright & I feel blessed.

When I am sad I...
cry, think, write, pray.

When I am afraid I...
pray.

When I am angry I...
crank music and need a few minutes to recover.

When I am complimented I...
say thank you and the thought may stick with me for awhile :).

When I am nervous I...
most likely am in the position where I have to speak in front of a group in my grad classes.

When I am lonely I...
go for a drive or watch a good movie to get my mind off of it.

I have never...
been to Florida.

I would never...
do drugs.

I'd rather die than...
denounce my relationship with Christ.

I would like very much to...
get married when I graduate with my MSW.

My closest friend is...
my boyfriend, he's cared for me more lately than anyone else in my life.

My hero is...
Jesus.

Growing up, I...
learned about loss and love early in life.

My relationships have been...
not always positive, but have shaped me into the stronger, wiser person I am today.

The most important wardrobe staple is...
a good pair of jeans. :D

Everyone should know that...
i would do whatever i could to help a friend who is in need

The best piece of advice I could give is...
treasure your time with those you love, you never know when they can be taken away.

I think the world would be a better place if...
everybody loved just a little more.

If I had one wish, I would wish for...
humbleness for all people.

When it comes to politics I...
used to not care but now want to fight for social justice for the oppressed and hurting.

When I am bored, I like to...
browse xanga, cook, scrapbook, watch a movie.

When I need to relax, I like to...
take a shower, talk to my boyfriend, listen to good worship music.

I can't stand it when people...
put their values in material objects/superficial people.

I love it when people...
are real.

I think the most important thing in life is...
taking responsibility for your actions.

At night, I often dream about...
the past-good and bad.

My bad habits are...
those things which I would like to have hoped I have gotten past.

In all honesty, I really think...
few people know who I really am these days.

I always avoid...
conflict. Well not always, but I tend to.

I get excited when...
a semester is over.

My hometown is...
where I happen to be residing currently. I've moved so much, it's simpler that way.

My weaknesses are ...
those things which take me away from Christ.

My strengths are...
those things I do and the trait I hold that glorify Christ.

My name is...
Sarah Florida.

I am...
a social worker in training.

I leave saying...
make the most of what you have.

more pre-semester thoughts.

So grad school starts up again in approximately five days for me-I am 2 semesters away from having my Masters in Social Work. It's hard to believe sometimes but then I realize where I have come from and realize this is God's intended journey for me indeed. I am excited to be able to help people in need with the professional skills, knowledge, and networks available to assist me in doing so. I can't help but be stressed thinking about it as I will be taking six classes this semester along with a 16-20 hr a week internship. I am going to have to manage my time carefully! But I don't have much of a social life anymore so I think I will be able to manage somehow and I really, really, really want my degree in my hand come May 08, 2010 so it will ALL be worth it. I am praying for God for peace of mind as I deal with financial and time obligations and having a positive support system to help me through. Being a social worker starts with taking care of yourself first so that is something I continue to strive for throughout this educational experience that demands much out of me. The hard work will pay off in the end :) I am just happy my time under the restrictions of an educational institution will soon be coming to an end! I am so thankful for getting so far! There will be a big celebration on my part come May for sure! :)

ramblings of a social work student (previously posted on my xanga)

I have been finding some really interesting blogs to read on http://www.socialworkblogs.info/ regarding social workers direct experience with their training and work in the field...sorry xanga, I just really want to get a feel for what people are encountering as social workers since I have not been doing any field experience in the last few months due to summer. I still love xanga but when it comes down to it, this place is more of the time more of an an entertainment source than a professional resource. so of course it looks like I will be bouncing between the sites as I am interesting in both writing outlets. Anyways, as I read peoples own stories of working with clients, I wonder: will I be a good social worker, will I have the confidence, or the right words to say, the knowledge on hand to diagnose people who need mental health assistance. Concurrently, I realize I should not let my own insecurities hold me from helping people-after all there is no greater desire I have than to help the poor, sick, needy, and hurting. I know that this is indeed social work indeed is the field God has called me to for such a time as this.... I just have to go forth and do it! Experience and confidence will come with the training and application of the skills I pick up. I am coming to realize that additional blogging about my experiences may also be another wonderful tool in my continued learning process to help me reflect on what I have encountered and piece it better together to help me grow as a social worker. I know that I am not the same from all the social work skills I have accumulated in the year since I have entered the social work field and in another year, I will definately go even further. I am praying that I maintain humbleness in it all as I act in kindness and service to clients in need. I am also seeking a job at the end of this that will give me further purpose as a result of my training as an Master's level Social Worker. Through I am leaning more towards heading back to my roots in New England, who knows if the Lord will have me stay put here in Rochester. He holds the pen, not I and I give Him the pen as I continue this journey.


(for more of my previous posts go here